Hayden Panettiere is the latest celebrity to open up about her experience with grief, after Regina King, Austin Butler and Jennifer Aniston shared how it affected them.
After losing her brother, Jansen, suddenly to an undiagnosed heart condition, Panettiere spoke about her newfound love for exercise that helped with the grieving process. “My body just started reacting, not just from the working out. It allowed me to release the stress, the high expectations I’d always put on myself,” she said in an interview with People magazine.
However, it’s not just the rich and famous who turn to fitness as an emotional outlet. Newsweek spoke to two women who processed their grief through moving their bodies.
From left: Holly Matthews with husband Ross Matthews and their two children Brooke and Texas; and Lou Haynes and husband Pete have three children between them: Will, Charlie and Matilda. The two women told Newsweek about their experiences with grief.
Holly Matthews/Lou Haynes
Lou Haynes’ life took a devastating turn in December 2022 when her husband died suddenly after contracting bacterial meningitis. It happened so fast that Haynes barely had time to process it.
One Saturday morning, Pete, a healthy 40-year-old dad-of-three, complained of flu-like symptoms and an earache, so he told Haynes he was going to get some rest upstairs.
“Then the next thing we knew, we heard a massive bang from upstairs, and I didn’t know what happened. I went upstairs to find him unconscious on the floor,” Haynes told Newsweek.
Hours later, Pete quickly deteriorated and, despite medical efforts, he died after his brain swelled. “There was nothing they could do; it took him within hours,” Haynes added. Their children, 6, 8 and 14 at the time, found it very traumatic.
For months, the mom from London, England, wandered through life, consumed by grief and the harsh reality of being a single parent. However, six months after Pete’s death, a friend encouraged Haynes to return to the gym.
“I realized that I really enjoyed it, and it was really good for me. Because you’re focusing on what you’re doing, you’re not really thinking about anything else,” Haynes said.
Lou Haynes (in red hat) smiles with Pete (left) and their kids. She told Newsweek that exercise is a time where she can switch off, escape the realities of grief and have some much-needed time for herself.
Lou Haynes
While Haynes had always been active, the gym now has a deeper purpose: “I have to be here for my children. There’s simply no option. I have to be fit and strong and healthy,” she said.
Haynes’ children have also found solace in exercise. Her son, Charlie, threw himself into soccer, using sport as an escape, while her daughter Matilda turned to dance to express her grief.
Haynes told Newsweek that she is now raising money for research and awareness charity Meningitis Now in Pete’s memory. One of her friends completed a skydive and raised a lot of funds.
“That’s the thing; when the worst possible thing happens to you, life around you just carries on. We’re all just trying to muddle along, one day at a time,” Haynes said.
Holly Matthews became a widowed mom-of-two when she lost her husband to a rare brain tumor in 2017.
Diagnosed in 2014, Ross lived for three years before dying in a hospice. Matthews, who was left to care for two young daughters, was familiar with grief before Ross’ death.
“Initially, there were moments of Ross being Ross, but very quickly, from my perspective, he was not responding as the husband that I knew,” Matthews told Newsweek. She recognized her husband was slipping away from her earlier than others.
For the mom-of-two, exercise had always been a part of her life in one way or another. This time, Matthews used walking to get out of the house. “It wasn’t just the physical aspect; it was the change of scenery and the fresh air. In terms of grief, I was having to work out who I was and what life would be like without Ross,” she said.
Holly Matthews (right) smiles with husband Ross on vacation in Italy. Following his death, she has written a book titled “Find Your Confidence.”
Holly Matthews
Her daughters, Brooke and Texas, were her priority, but Matthews knew she had to take care of herself to be there for them. “Just going for a walk and getting out of my own head allowed me to process my grief and also adjust to this new version of life,” she told Newsweek.
Dr. Elena Touroni, a consultant psychologist and cofounder of The Chelsea Psychology Clinic in London, England, told Newsweek that exercise can be incredibly beneficial during the grieving process.
“It provides an emotional outlet, offering a sense of release when emotions feel overwhelming. Physical activity helps to reduce stress by lowering levels of cortisol, a stress hormone, which can be particularly elevated during grief,” Touroni said.
When someone is dealing with grief and engaging in exercise, several things are happening in the brain. Touroni said that physical activity stimulates the release of chemicals such as endorphins, serotonin and dopamine, all of which play a crucial role in regulating mood and emotions.
“Endorphins help to relieve pain and stress, giving you a natural ‘high,’ which can temporarily lift your mood. Serotonin and dopamine contribute to feelings of happiness and well-being, counteracting the emotional lows that are so common during grief,” Touroni said.
Grief is a personal journey and what might work for some may not work for others. “Exercise can be a helpful part of healing, but it’s important to combine it with other forms of emotional support, such as talking to friends, family, or a therapist,” Touroni added.
“Balance is key—use exercise as a way to care for your body and mind, but also allow yourself the space to feel and process your grief.”
