A mom has shared a glimpse of the painful but occasionally hilarious reality of what it is like when your young child goes through a sleep regression.
There’s no easy part to parenting but the first year certainly takes a significant toll on moms and dads when it comes to sleep.
According to a survey of 1,300 parents conducted by nursery furniture and bedding company Snuz, parents lost an average of 133 nights worth of sleep over the first year of their newborn’s life.
Sleep regressions are a big part of that. Repeated wake-ups, crying, general fussing and an aversion to bedtime itself are all characteristics of the dreaded sleep regression. Some have suggested these regressions are triggered by developmental milestones.
Whatever the case, they can cause havoc for parents as Rachel Seward, a first-time mom living in Bognor Regis, in the West Sussex area of the U.K., can attest.
“Thomas was a pretty good sleeper until the first sleep regression at around four months old,” Seward told Newsweek. “Since then any and every sleep regression that can affect infants affected him…and us! We all start to sleep well again for a few weeks or months until the next one hits.”
She said that Thomas’s sleep regressions tend to fall into one of two distinct categories.
“With some of the sleep regressions we struggled with multiple night wakings and with others it was the long struggle of getting him off to sleep,” Seward said. “I honestly don’t know which is worse.”
Eager to offer a glimpse of the chaos they face on a nightly basis, Seward uploaded a video to TikTok, under the handle @miscarriageandme, of her husband trying to get Thomas to go to sleep.
It proves to be a trying experience with the sleep-deprived dad forced to grapple with his son to try and settle him down.
“The 18 month sleep regression is definitely here,” she wrote alongside the clip. “When you are the parent in there, in the thick of it, it is hell. But watching from the outside you have to admit it is pretty funny!”
Rachel Seward’s toddler going through a sleep regression, captured on a baby monitor. Mom Rachel has shared the realities of tackling the night time routine.
TikTok/miscarriageandme
Seward said: “Although he was physically tired it was as if his brain couldn’t switch off and let him go to sleep, so we would spend around an hour most evenings trying to help him go to sleep. Although, like in the video, it felt like most of that time was spent wrestling him as he was tossing, turning and climbing onto our heads!”
Seward regularly posts to TikTok and has not shied away from showcasing the highs and devastating lows of her journey into parenthood, which has included trying to conceive and a miscarriage.
She said she decided to share the video to show that while situations like this are stressful, there is a lighter side to the chaos that night time brings.
“My husband and I take turns with bedtimes especially during sleep regressions as the exhaustion is a lot and it really tests your patience as a parent,” she said.
She’s keen to take the “stigma” out of so many topics around parenthood and hopes her videos help others realize they are not alone in fighting these battles.
The good news for her is that Thomas has now turned 20 months and appears to have overcome some of those sleep regression issues. To her, it’s a reminder of her best bit of advice to any new parent out there— “everything is a phase.”
“Right now it seems tough, exhausting and like it is never going to end. But it will. I promise. It does get better,” she said.
If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
